What’s your love language?

For the love of…

Love Languages

Unhappiness in marriage often has a simple root cause: we speak different love languages, believes Dr Gary Chapman – a marriage counsellor. According to his thirty years working in relationships – he identified five love languages that all people express and interpret love.

Chapman suggests that to discover another person’s love language, one must observe the way they express love to others, analyse what they complain about most often, and what they request from their significant other most often. He theorises that people tend to naturally give love in the way that they prefer to receive love. It is also possible to find another person’s love language by asking those same questions.

Here are Chapman’s five love languages :

Affirmation – This language uses words to affirm other people.

Acts of Service – For these people, actions speak louder than words.

Receiving Gifts – For some people, what makes them feel most loved is to receive a gift.

Quality Time – This language is all about giving the other person your undivided attention

Physical Touch – To this person, nothing speaks more deeply than appropriate touch.


What’s your love language? Did you guess your partner’s correctly? My partner can give me all the flowers and all the cuddles (which is greatly appreciated) but I feel the most loved when he helps me clean the house – I know, I’m such a romantic. My love language is Acts of Service followed closely by Quality Time.

As a Partnerships Educator; I co facilitate a pre marriage education program that couples can do before they bestow the Sacrament of marriage upon each other. It’s a warm and fuzzy *job being in a room full of couples just oozing love for one another! One of the many brilliant sessions we do is on love languages because a benefit of understanding your partners love language is that you can really help your relationship.

If you have had fun with this and want to play more YouTube Love Languages Gary Chapman – Go on it’s Valentines Day. Kiss, Kiss or should I say clean, clean.. x


Anna Owens is the founder of ownsit! A mama working in Community Development and Partnerships Education. Anna is a colour crazy, creativity enthusiast who loves to design, collect shoes, eat & travel.. x

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